"every shot, every shot, every shot..."

this is gonna be a pure tennis post.... just to let you know :) and i have an inkling that it's gonna be long.
so butterfilies are aweful (and jenny would say they were ugly), so i have to say, i didn't enjoy them today.
of course i am not talking about real ones, i am talking about the ones you get when you are super nervous. kind of like a, lost-my-appetite and always-know-where-the-closest-trash-can-is feeling. kind of stuck with me all day. then the mail came this afternoon and i got my book.
here's a little sidenote: so i ordered this book off of amazon.com that was a biographical book on suzanne lenglen and helen wills (the two tennis girls i was trying to decide between to do my PE paper on... i know, both in the same book? awesome!) and it was only 10 cents. cool thing though that i want to spread the word about... i bought it used through a company that sells through amazon called "Books for the Future", and i got this email after i ordered it saying that because i bought a book from them, they planted a tree! every book they sell, they plant a tree in "the village of Willanen, in the department of Kaffrine, Senegal, an area devastated by deforestation and global climate change." isn't that awesome? so if you are buying a book through amazon, i encourage you to check if this place has it first.
so, back to tennis/the book. i got the book, which is like 470 pages and huge... i was impressed, i thought it would be dinky. but it turns out that there is a lot to be told between the two of them. the way the book is set up is that it tells about suzanne, then helen, then the match between the two, and then a bunch of stuff that happens after (it goes in chronological order for the most part). so i read the first little bit of suzanne, and i wasn't liking it too much. i just couldn't relate to much of it, and she was a bit of a drama queen, and maybe a bit like what i would say sharapova or serena would have been in that day (except suzanne would drink brandy on changeovers every once in a while... i don't think that is allowed anymore). i won't deny the fact that she was an amazing tennis player though.
so after a bit, i skipped ahead to helen's section... and from the start, i liked what i was reading. i can't even begin to describe how incredible she is. and i have to say that this author did an amazing job with the writing and all his info in stuff... he uses a lot of quotes of helen, of people that knew her, of journalists that wrote, and he incorporates a lot of history and the development of tennis in to it.
so turns out, california was where it was at for tennis... the westerners (californians) gained this sweet reputation for being really good in comparison to the east... and in california, tennis was for every one, with hard courts springing up all over the place and being free to play on, where as on the east coast being grass courts in country clubs that required membership. there was this funny quote to tell why californians were rising up so fast: "Of course they play well out there, where it is always June!" cause the grass courts were often soggy and couldn't be played on in the east. funny stuff.
so i have chosen helen wills for my based on many things, but i think a few of her quotes will sum it up:
"...to slide, lunge, and dive does not conform to good style in tennis, but there is dignity of sincerity in the scramble."
"By working steadily on the thing that i like (tennis) i can remove from my mind momentary spells of sadness or irritation or anger, and afterwards feel happy and almost peaceful."
"What indeed does anything matter, either during a match or after, if you have done as well as you are able on every shot?"
(this is something the author said of her... keep in mind she was a teenager during this time)"In 1921 she had been promising. in 1922 she had been promising and accomplished. in 1923 she was awesome."
"but really it is much more fun to run to the net and try some smashing volleying shots. They seem to call that a 'man's game.' But i don't. I just call it fun."

so reading all this got me pumped for tryouts. they talked about her amazing focus and concentration, and ability to tune everything out. i started to relax a bit, and this last quote is what i thought, hey, this could work. she said that during her matches, she always would have some kind of mantra, something she would keep repeating to herself. and more often than not, it was this: "every shot, every shot, every shot." she said that the only shot she would think about was the present one. the moment the ball left her racket, no matter good or bad, that shot was now in the past and forgotten. she focused on each shot as it came, and let it go as it went. so i says to myself i says, "there ya go, think about that!"

and it worked... for the first 15 minutes. and then the butterflies were back, and the realization of the moment came back... and i don't like being watched very much... and when you realize it's tryouts, you realize that that is all that is happening... everyone is being watched, and everyone is watching eachother, and it's just, aaaahhhhh. so i say phooey to tonight's tennis... pretty ugly tennis, without a lot of pretty (although my serve was doing well...). i need to work on focusing.
but, to end on a good note, i still had a good ol' time hitting that fuzzy yellow tennis ball. i'm out there doing what i love to do, and i can't really ask for more.

and, to jump back a paragraph, i think "every shot, every shot, every shot" could be transferred over to life... "every day, every day, every day." in college, it is very easy to think way ahead... i mean, it's not even winter yet and i am lining up a summer job (i'm gonna wait on sharing this one... but i will say one word: colorado)! it's so easy to think about tomorrow, and next month, and so on. but if you take your eye off the ball, you just might swing in miss like i did on one shot tonight (i know, ouch). so... "every day, every day, every day."

and to go back on what i just said...
not next week but the week after... i'ma comin' home for christmas break!
i love you guys. remember that. and, as my roomie would say, make good choices. that's important.

:)